Fear

(I know two blog posts in one day.....who would've thunk it?)

The house is quiet and everyone (including my wildcat Oscar is sleeping). The last few days have been chaotic, to say the least. What really upsets me more than anything, is I feel gripped by fear, which in turn makes me feel that I'm not in control....which is never a good thing.

Of course, I have fear for my BB. I fear that he has to go under surgery again so soon. I've watched him as he tries to be his stoic self and be the 'man' and not admit that he's in pain so badly that it brings him to his knees.

I fear for PMM. She's starting school again and her best friend moved this summer. She's aprehensive about school and I keep trying to comfort her, encourage her...but at the same time I have such fear for her. Worried that someone will be mean to her, or that she'll be playing by herself on the playground....because I want so much for her.

I, even, have fear for me. I've never been in the situation that I haven't had family to lean on in a situation. The stubborn Irish West-Virginian woman wants to take on the world all by herself. Doesn't want to ask for anyone's help. Unfortunately, I don't have a choice in this situation. People have had to cover my shifts at work, neighbors have picked up Mogley from school, kept her while I was at the hospital, etc. I also find myself very blessed to have the friends and neighbors around me that do pitch in when the need arises. They have been such a wonderful support and comfort, that I could never repay their kindness and selflessness.

Please keep all of us in your thoughts and prayers. I will keep you guys updated.

Update and Yummy Salsa

Thank you for those that sent prayers and well-wishes to my BB! Here's the latest...(according to the neurologist that did BB's back surgery) Fluid, blood and other 'ick's built up around the operative wound. The doc took needles and aspirated (drained) the fluid and stuff from around the incision (YEOWW!) BB was doing really well and we were getting ready to be discharged when Doc came in to do the final paperwork. He looked at BB's back and said "$#*@" and "You, sir, aren't going anywhere!" In other words, the fluid has built back up around the incision site, worse than it was the first time. So it's back to the operating room for my precious hubby, he has to report at 5:30am tomorrow morning. The doctor said that he is re-installing the postoperative drain and BB will have to remain in the hospital until the drain is "bone-dry". Needless to say, that doesn't make either of us happy. Neither one of us has gotten much sleep having to be apart. Last night, I think neither one of us moved in our sleep because we were so exhausted! Please keep the prayers and thoughts coming until this whole ordeal is over! They are much appreciated!


Amid the chaos that is life right now, I did manage to make some homemade salsa with all the lovely delicious tomatoes that BB has grown. Doesn't it look yummy???


Here's my recipe:



Earl's Gentle Simple Salsa


3 tomatoes, whole and chopped coarsely

1 small cucumber, chopped finely

3 green onions, chopped coarsely

1 small onion, chopped finely

2 tsp fresh chopped garlic (chopped finely)

2 small jalapeno peppers, chopped finely

1/2 cup chopped fresh cilantro

1 small can of green chilis, coarsly chopped

2 tsp of sugar

juice of one lime

salt and pepper to taste


It tastes so fresh and refreshing! This recipe is very very mild (I can't do hot and spicy!) so I seeded the jalapenos. But if you're more daring, you'll need to add more chilis or jalapenos to make it spicy. I also didn't seed my tomatoes, I like the 'juice' in salsa. The cucumber adds a nice flavor, but doesn't overpower the salsa. Me and BB like it a lot! Enjoy!!

Yummmm.....and surgery update!

Needless to say, our meal at the Japanese Steakhouse was totally yummy! Oooh, my tummy hurt in a real good way! LOL!

Now, for a surgery update. BB's surgery yesterday went wonderfully. Upon coming out of anesthesia, he was raring to go and spent yesterday walking up and down the hallways of the hospital and being totally charming to the whole nursing staff! The doc kept him last night in the hospital because of the drain at the incision site in his back, but it was removed this morning and I got to bring him home. He's doing so well and will soon be back to normal!

I'm off work for the next few days to take care of BB...so expect some no-nonsense boring housewife sorta posts...LOL, and I'm loving it!